Commonwealth Advisory

Ministry of Shame Games have issued the following advisory for our esteemed guests coming (if they are) for the biggest games organized in the city. Hope it will help them to have fun in the city...

1) Its perfectly fine to call each other "Oye bhen####" in Delhi.  Drop the same word in your conversation, these are like helping verbs, makes you one of our own.

2) After turning on headlights of your car, its perfectly fine to drive wherever you want, right side, wrong side, on road, on people... all good.

3) If by chance you got into an accident, beat the very next rickshawala you come across. Its always his fault.

4) Whenever you have to get on a bridge, always check the make, made by Chinese, Vietnamis, Bangladesh, OK, but Made by India?, skip it, even if you have to swim to the shores.

5) Remember you had a desire to participate in Amazing Race, Survivor? Welcome to Delhi, one place to make your dreams come true.

6) Red is the new Green when it comes to traffic signal.

7) Don't panic when you see cows, dogs on the street, we believe in equality, if we are alowed to walk freely, so are they.

8) And if you see us doing our business on streets, refer to point 7, if they are alowed to carry on their's on streets.....

9) If you are white, you will get a warm welcome, whosoever you talk to, will give you a huge smile, and welcome you with open arms.

10) If you are black, you will recieve even warmer welcome, with people running towards you to ask if you got any dope on you.

11) If you are "Asian", there are bright chances that you will be offered a job either at a "chinese" restaurant, or the booth outside every stret.

12) Trust me, this is the cleanest our city will ever become, thank you Commonwealth...