The best, the worst and the in between - adieu 2010

The year is racing to a finish, and it is time to look back at what went by, or rather whizzed by. I wish I could have read more, seen more films, traveled more places – and eaten less
Films: There were some really good ones and there were some really bad ones, and then there was mostly a lot of stuff in between. After a hiatus from Bollywood I went back to watching a lot of BW films (mostly what released in theaters here), while picking my HW films with care and caution! Here is a HW list:
1. Inception – loved the film, the mind-bender that kept us thinking and discussing for days on end. Leo DiCaprio did not disappoint and Marion Cotillard was luminous.

Tees Maar Khan review *spoilers*

The Tale of a Conman and his Wife

You know you're in for an erm... experience when you see Shirish Kunder putting himself in the credits six times. He exceeds Midget Khan levels, who has a habit of focusing on a giant "A" for as long as other movies would finish their entire credit sequences in. His gall is so jaw dropping his credit as "music director" comes before the one for Vishal Shekhar!

The film soon begins with in vitro animations of a dancing baby (pole dancing, no less) quite obviously stolen from the famous "dancing baby" of the 90s.  Born to be a conman (modeled on Mr. Farah Khan himself?) he will grow up to be Akshay Kumar aka Tees Maar Khan.

A hamming police chief comes on to talk about gazillions of rupees worth of loot being taken to Delhi by train which they expected to be stolen by Siamese twins, the Johri brothers. Kunder doesn't seem to have learned after the Anupam Kher dwarf fiasco in Jaan-E-Maan that just putting the differently-abled on screen doesn't make it instantly hilarious.

The Johri brothers would need the help of other crooks among whom is someone named Ismail Koyla.  Witness the supposed hilarity in the script that took four years to write: "It's hard to tell if Ismail is blacker than koyla or if koyla is blacker than Ismail!" The poor jokes keep coming among which is how Ismail's weapon is the "black of night." Har har.

Tees Maar Khan reviews! 1.8/5 so far

While we await the major ones from India, the film has released in the UK, UAE and USA and some reviews are coming in.
searchindia.com  (no rating) "Even by the lowly standards of Akshay Kumar's recent films like Action Replayy, Tees Maar Khan is bad."
upodcasting.com (no rating) "It’s what Housefulll wishes it was, what Action Replayy could never accomplish and what Golmaal lies in bed at night crying it could be one day."
Renuka Rao dnaindia.com 1.5/5 Tees Maar Khan is a classic example of a cluttered film in which a hodgepodge of characters incoherently jabbers ludicrous dialogues building up an odd plot that just refuses to make any sense at any point of time.
Nikhat Kazmi TOI 2.5/5 But eventually, fun needs a foundation too and spoofs need some substance to carry them through. TMK has colour, humour, pace but nothing does seem to fall in place in terms of plot and character connect.
Zahra Khan, Associated Post USA 1.5/5  Tees Maar Khan is a classic example of a disordered film in which a sputtering incoherent jumble of characters absurd dialogues build a strange plot that just refuses to make any sense at any point in time.
Rachel Salz, NYT unrated “Om Shanti Om,” a huge box office success, was Bollywood at its most pleasurable. “Tees Maar Khan” is Bollywood going through the motions.
moviereviews.ae unrated Other Akshay Kumar movies have been blasted in the past, but this one will take the cake for being the most unlikeable of the lot!
Mihir Fadnavis 0.5/5 ‘Tees Maar Khan’ is brutally unfunny, horrendously contrived and wholly annoying.
Pankaj Sabnani (Glamsham) 2.5/5 The film isn't exactly unbearable, but falls way short of expectations. 
Kunal Guha, Yahoo 1.5/5  The dialogues are lame and lack wit, punch, drama and everything else one expects from filmy dialogues.
Taran Adarsh bollywoodhungama.com  3/5  If only its content was powerful enough, it would've truly been a tees maar entertainer! 
Gaurav Malani Economic Times 2.5/5 Tees Maar Khan doesn’t even guarantee thirty good laughs in its three hour runtime.
Aseem Chhabra rediff.com 1.5/5 TMK, scripted by Khan's husband?Shirish Kunder, is like that tasteless, dull chewing gum that you feel like throwing away as soon as you take the first bite.
Anupama Chopra ndtv.com 2/5 Tees Maar Khan.. is disappointingly limp and insistently low IQ. The film has little of the effervescence and flair of a typical Farah Khan film.
Sukanya Verma Rediff 2/5 Sheila ki Jawaani ...But that's not going to wipe the disappointment off genuine admirers of Farah's quirky creativity, including yours truly.
Raja Sen Rediff 2/5 And even as our arms do obediently rise for Tees Maar Khan, they do so more to facepalm in whatmighthavebeen exasperation rather than applaud boisterously, as they did with her earlier films.
Sukanya Venkatraghavan Filmfare UNRATED Tees Maar Khan directed by Farah Khan (How could you!) is just a relentless assault on your senses.
Vinod Mirani indiantelevision.com  UNRATED In fact, Tees Maar Khan loses steam about 15 minutes into the film after the song Sheela ki jawani and becomes intolerable post-interval.
Khalid Mohamed PFC 1.5/5 Throughout you’re shocked by the higgledy-piggledy screenplay and the blood-curdlingly loud direction.
Mayank Shekhar HT 1/5 It’s one thing to repeatedly make ‘nudge nudge wink wink’ sort of ironic nod to films or ‘filmies’. It’s quite another to know nothing else. 
Rajeev Masand CNN IBN 2/5 it’s surprising she delivered not the trademark Farah Khan entertainer one expected from her, but a typical harebrained Akshay Kumar comedy instead.

50 cr weekend predicted for Tees Maar Khan

Ormax Media Launches Moviescope: Predicts 50 Cr Weekend For Tees Maar Khan Sunday 20th December 2010 23.00 IST

Press Release Mumbai, Dec 19, 2010: Media research and consulting film Ormax Media has predicted that Farah Khan’s Tees Maar Khan, releasing on Dec 24, is set for a historic Rs. 50 cr opening weekend net collections. The film stars Akshay Kumar and Katrina Kaif. The box office prediction has been arrived using Ormax Media’s newly launched film research tool Moviescope. Moviescope is a Film Research Engine designed to take care of all the needs of a producer. This includes four components - Ad Pre-Test, Film Pre-Test, Awareness Tracking (Cinematix) and Exit Polls.

Tees Maar Khan Updated with Bade Dilwala promo!

‘I’m not shy of going fully mental. I like mad things’- Farah Khan

Harneet Singh Tags : farah khan, bollywood, eye cover story, tees maar khan Posted: Sun Nov 28 2010, 14:12 hrs New Delhi:

“When I said that I’d never do a film without Shah Rukh Khan, I meant it with all my heart. But circumstances changed. I miss him most as a friend”

The Music of Tees Maar Khan – some quick thoughts!

Farah Khan teams up with Akshay Kumar, in a Shirish Kunder script with music by Vishal Shekhar (and Shirish Kunder). The curiosity level is sky-high! After two back to back big hits that both had chart-buster type music, Farah chose to branch out on her own and produce and direct a film for her own production house – and to do it without her regular star, Shahrukh Khan. Tees Maar Khan was written by Shirish and with Akshay Kumar in mind. We were told that Sheila ki Jawaani a blockbuster gift from Farah to Katrina Kaif and it will be the Mother of all Item songs, leaving Munni Badnaam Hui biting the dust in its wake.
So what does the music of Tees Maar Khan offer?
The title track has Sonu Niigaam singing in 54 different voices (including an Akshay Kumar impression) and accents (including a faux Chinese one!). This track is composed by Shirish Kunder. There is an opening musical interlude that reminds one of the track sung by Ashanti in Bride and Prejudice and this is no doubt the “hook” that will be the Tees Maar Khan theme.

Is Tees Maar Khan an "inspired" version of a Peter Sellers' film?

Tees Maar Khan copy of Peter Sellers' After The Fox? 
By Bollywood Hungama News Network, 

How many of you have heard about the most famous Hollywood comedian (after Charlie Chaplin of course) Peter Sellers? If not, please watch his movie The Party. Anyway, the point to bring up a man of such repertoire is because his films are still inspiring a lot of filmmakers from Bollywood. Peter Sellers 1966 Italian film After The Fox (Caccia Alla Volpe) is one such example. Yes, you heard it.

But the word 'inspiration' is too cliche. It's 'similarities' that count when our filmmakers get inspired. After a bit of research, we found out that one of the most anticipated films of this year,Tees Maar Khan, is a fully inspired version of the 1966 comedy, After The Fox starring Peter Sellers. And after watching the trailer, here are some of the 'similarities' evident between both the films:

Peter Sellers plays Aldo Vanucci (aka the Fox), one of the greatest criminals of the world, and master of disguise. After Aldo escapes from the Italian prison he was held in, he meets again with his friends, and plans to retrieve the "gold of Cairo" a large shipment of gold, that waits to be unloaded somewhere in Italy. Aldo devices the perfect plan. Posing as a famous director, he finds the ideal coastal village to unload the shipment, and persuades the entire population that he has chosen their village as the set for his new movie.

Farah Khan/SRK rift updated

 Here is what SRK had to say about the whole thing.. in Feb '10 issue of Cineblitz:

Copied or merely similar? You be the judge (Let us know what you think!)

Here is the Tees Maar Khan title track:

And here is what I think the inspiration was:

You be the judge!

(the trail to Ashanti's Bride and Prejudice song was provided by Baba)

Tees Maar Khan updated theatrical trailer!

Tees Maar Khan updated w/new Sanjay Dutt news

Farah is doing her usual nautanki and adding a hundred stars as expected. After Salman Khan, it's Sanjay Dutt's turn.

(click to enlarge)

Tees Maar Khan: First pic from title song

Still from Tees Maar Khan

Still from Tees Maar Khan

Kat to do a Mads in Tees Maar Khan

Katrina Kaif, who plays a wannabe heroine in Farah Khan's Tees Maar Khan, has her work cut out for. The director-choreographer wants her to emulate Madhuri Dixit's style for a song in the film. Kat will be playing a village bell in the dance and will have to copy Madhuri's infamous thumkas. In fact, Farah has given the actress Madhuri's DVDs to watch so that Kat can get the expressions and the thumkas right. Katrina will rehearse for the song for 15-20 days before it's shooting takes place at Malshej Ghat. Aki Narula has designed Kat's costume for the song.

While Madhuri's traditional songs, from Ek do teen (Tezaab) and Chane ke khet mein (Anjaam) to Dil dhak dhak (Beta) and Dola re (Devdas) earned her much acclaim, it remains to be seen if the Ajab Prem Ki Ghazab Kahani actress can do justice to Mads style. But then, hard work can get you anywhere, right Kat?

LINK

Kat to do a Mads in Tees Maar Khan

Katrina Kaif, who plays a wannabe heroine in Farah Khan's Tees Maar Khan, has her work cut out for. The director-choreographer wants her to emulate Madhuri Dixit's style for a song in the film. Kat will be playing a village bell in the dance and will have to copy Madhuri's infamous thumkas. In fact, Farah has given the actress Madhuri's DVDs to watch so that Kat can get the expressions and the thumkas right. Katrina will rehearse for the song for 15-20 days before it's shooting takes place at Malshej Ghat. Aki Narula has designed Kat's costume for the song.

While Madhuri's traditional songs, from Ek do teen (Tezaab) and Chane ke khet mein (Anjaam) to Dil dhak dhak (Beta) and Dola re (Devdas) earned her much acclaim, it remains to be seen if the Ajab Prem Ki Ghazab Kahani actress can do justice to Mads style. But then, hard work can get you anywhere, right Kat?

LINK